Positivity - The 1st Two Rules

1) Don't think of the red apple.
2) Don't look to your kitchen and see / wonder what your kids or spouse is doing.
3) Don't imagine your pet dog walking around like Goofy.

Bet you had a hard time to NOT do any of the above!

Why?

Because there are certain words and instructions which the human brain does not register; the "don't" word being one of them.

This is one of the many exercises our trainees used to go through while I was running training workshops few years back. ( Stop trying already! )

As the training workshops back then was related to Personal Protection; one of the most important factors we always share with our participants in terms of personal, survival, security or law enforcement safety is:

How we talk to ourselves - a.k.a Self Talk

Admit it! Yes! We do talk to ourselves! Don't you? - such Self Talk not only applied to those physical altercations as taught during our training but also in our personal, professional lives.

We all do, be it in words, or even a feeling described as butterflies in the stomach; especially when you're on a date with a hunk/ babe but feels like they are James Bond or La Femme Nakita waiting to pull their guns out on you?

Rule 1 - Listen to the truth.

Learn to trust your gut and your instincts, they are usually right. Not all self-talk is silent and unconscious. Most of us have spent years saying something negative about ourselves over and over without understanding how this can affect us.(ADMIT IT!)

• “I’m just lousy with my dates! ”
• “I can’t read a map !"
• “I can't control my diet!"
• “I always can't remember where I left my phone in the kitchen”
• “I hate to talk in front of a crowd,”

...... and lots more.....

Work? Do you ever find yourself saying

• “I’m only an average employee”
• “My boss doesn’t like me”
• “I’m no good at reports”

...... and even lots more.....

Any of the above sounds familiar?

Rule 2 - protect yourself from the negative.

Like most things, this is easier said than done. You can walk into the gym and tell yourself, “I’m gonna love the run on the mill today!” or "I'm gonna love my workout today!"

But if you don’t change your behavior, your technique, or your attitude, you’re probably still going to hate it.

Examine why you hate the gym:

• Is the machine too hi-tech to use or too big for you?
• Have you tried to ask for help from the trainers? or are you reluctant to?
• Have you had some bad training / experience?

Fix the outside, and then change that negative self talk into a positive.

• “I’m gonna do great today because I asked the trainers for help!”
• “I’m gonna rock today because I finally figured how it works!”

Self talk isn't just about words, it’s also about behavior, attitude and actions

When you finish an hour on mill, 30 pushups, crunches etc. do you tell yourself:

• “Great job I did there!”

Or do you just say

• “Wow that was lucky.”

When the someone compliments you on your great workout, do you say

• “Thanks man!”

or do you just say

• “It was no big deal, it's a lucky day.”

This is our "Self Speak". We talk to ourselves everyday, the only challenge is most people tend to talk to themselves more on the negative end, rather than on the positive spectrum.

Hopefully with this first 2 rules and with practice, we are all able to slowly see how a simple shift in our own internal paradigm enables an increase in the positive energy everyone is capable of carrying.

Jason